Break Ennui
We’re a few days from the first anniversary of inauguration day, and it’s hard to remember how our nation felt back then. Many of us were worried about fascism, but few of us truly understood how fast it would move. Now, it’s hard to remember not knowing that.
This is normalization, and we have to fight it. We need to remember what the world was like without fascism. We have to hold that vision.
How to do it:
Time Capsule:
If you’ve been with us since Shasta first posted three simple actions a week after inauguration, you may have written a letter to yourself describing how you felt in that moment, what was happening, and what you feared was next. Whether you have older letters or not, write one now for future-you. Then read any older letters you have. Have you accepted and forgotten things that once felt important? Or are you panicked now, where previously you might have been determined? Consider adding a “p.s.” to your new letter describing what you realized, then store them all for next time.
Flashback:
Maybe you don’t have letters to review. You can still recreate some of those past feelings and compare them to now. Try to remember what you did on inauguration day, or the first time you heard about something shocking. What were you feeling? What were your thoughts? Try to be honest with yourself. If you didn’t think it would really be this bad, that’s okay. Lots of people didn’t. What we’re trying to do is push back on normalization: what are the things that were shocking when you learned about them, maybe so much you didn’t initially believe them, but which are now routine? Where have you become emotionally numb? What can you do to remind yourself?
Year in Review:
Another way to gain perspective is to review events of the past year. You could create a timeline of things the regime did, or read through The Weekly List by Amy Siskind. Another approach is to choose one activist you follow (HCR, Jay Kuo, etc.) and then sample their essays beginning at inauguration. Read one each month to see shifts you might not have noticed in real time.
Using one or more of the tactics above, take stock of how you’ve changed. Are you so panicked that calling Congress feels futile? Or are you so numb that you responded to the cold-blooded shooting of a white, civilian mom with “Well, we knew that was coming.” Somewhere in the middle is where you want to aim: aware but functioning. If you’re panicking, go back to basics. Make calls to Congress. Donate what you can. Do something. If you’re feeling numb, try to imagine how you would have responded if someone insisted this would happen before the inauguration. Act on how you would have felt then, until you recalibrate.
